For the past 2 months, I’ve woken up and immediately turned on social media.
It’s made my life demonstrably worse in every metric that matters: energy, mood, patience, and focus.
I told myself a story about why I needed to log in right away. I’m in Bali, 13 hours ahead of home. My morning is everyone else’s end of day. I’m releasing a book. I have to stay connected.
One morning, Alison saw me looking at my phone while scrambling eggs. “What’s going on?” she asked. I told her about the email I was responding to (at 7am). “Does that even matter right now?” She asked. “No,” I admitted. Then she came over and gave me a kiss and said: “it’s only a fire if you know about it.”
We humans are remarkably skilled at convincing ourselves of our own bullshit — so long as it makes our lives easier and more comfortable in the short term. That thing you think matters gains outsized importance the moment you know about it. Often the solution is as simple as not knowing about it yet.
When I’d get absorbed in whatever dumpster fire was happening in my business or the world, I’d ignore my kids. Ruin my mood. Spend the rest of the morning at a six out of ten.
I don’t want to be a six. A six is dead space. You accomplish nothing, but you also don’t recharge. The worst kind of busyness is vague, directionless, and reactive.
I want to be a one or a ten. Off or full send. At rest or fully alive.
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A few weeks ago I went on an overnight motorbike trip across Bali with a bunch of guys. Two days, phone off. Got back, turned it on, cleared my notifications in twenty minutes.
You’ve had this experience, right? You check constantly for days on end — then you’re away for a weekend and come back and wonder why you ever felt so tethered.
Because I write books and build a business in public, I can’t abandon social media entirely. But I can stop letting it own my mornings.
Introducing the Win Before You Login Challenge
Corny as hell name, I know.
Before turning on your phone, do 100 push-ups, 100 air squats, and read 10 pages of a book.
You don’t have to do it my way. Scale it to where you are. Twenty push-ups, a short walk, five pages, etc. Whatever creates the pattern of body and brain first, phone second. The specific numbers aren’t the point. The sequence is.
It’s been 9 days. I’m 9 for 9.
Mood, focus, and energy are all noticeably better. Alison noticed this too. My kids’ emotions have been better regulated. We’d been struggling with that lately, but this past week and a half has been genuinely better. I’ve been more patient, playful, and present as a father and think that’s part of it.
Want to do the challenge with me? Reply and let me know, or comment on my IG post about it. Would be fun to build something around this.
-Jon
P.S. Screen time down over 50% in the first week. Still have work to do, but great to see.
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